Shy girl. Joy for mom and for daughter?

Category: World out-of-fashion | 22 сентября 2014, 13:03

Fast forward to the Russian village of the 18th century.

We in the house of a wealthy peasant, where just now are the bride. Parents and matchmakers have already agreed and are waiting for the appearance of the bride. And here it is. The girl enters, carefully turning away and with downcast eyes. Answers the questions softly. Itself doesn't ask questions, first does not apply. Throughout the conversation is turned away, and picks his finger in the stove. That is, carefully demonstrates shyness.

Shyness in those days was one of the main advantages of the girl. And this is understandable. According to the "Domostroi", the exemplary wife's inheritance was complete, and unconditional submission to the husband, from which depended the whole welfare of the family. Perhaps when Adam plowed and eve spun, it was justified. And now, when Adam plowed and eve together?

Manifestations of shyness

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There is no person who, at least sometimes experienced embarrassment. A pleasant feeling? American psychologist Phil Zimbardo defines shyness as a short, but severe loss of self-esteem. Imagine if it becomes permanent? And that's exactly what happens to shy people. Internal complexes burn them from the inside, causing above all, put the impression you make. It is difficult for them to communicate. For any man they come up with a reason he should fear. They are afraid friends, because friends form opinions about them. They are afraid of strangers, because they can behave like something is wrong. Of course, the chiefs, because they depend on them. Subordinates, if any, there in front of them to embarrass myself, members of the opposite sex, because you might not live up to their expectations.

Thus it seems that shyness is the problem, visible only to him. Yes, it is full! Shifty eyes, cheeks at the slightest provocation, desire to remain silent or, on the contrary, aggressiveness, as a means of protection, signaling to everyone: "I feel shy. I'm afraid of you! I'm weaker than you!". Surrounding and immediately use it, trying to humiliate the person, and thus give him an extra reason for new fears.

These people have walled themselves off a set of conventions and prohibitions. They have created their own prison, and them jailers.

But, maybe not?


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Content:

1. Manifestations of shyness (You read that section);
2. The reasons for shyness girls (http://www.of-md.com/pr-stg/);
3. The effects of shyness (http://www.of-md.com/pls-stg/);
4. The ways to solve the problem (http://www.of-md.com/stg-rp/).