Рассказывает Генри Кпауд
Throughout adolescence I often heardparents one sentence (in different variations). »Soon you will be an independent, Henry. You need to learn to budget. » They never attended special courses, but I could see in their wisdom. The father and mother took care of my future. They realized that by the time I leave the house, I should learn a lot: and maintain accounts, and use a credit card, and arrange insurance for the car, and plan your work. It is important not so much the specific content of the advice as my understanding of the provisions of the parents:
adolescence - it is a limited amount of time allotted to prepare his son for an independent life. I am grateful to my father and mother for what they have done for me.
Одна моя приятельница прожила свое отрочество совершенно иначе. Ее родители — не словами, но всем своим поведением — давали ей понять: «Ты еще маленькая, так что делай то, что тебе велят, и точка». Родители жестко контролировали и ее саму, и троих ее сестер, и старшего брата. В доме сложилась гнетущая атмосфера. Чем старше она становилась, тем труднее ей было принимать правильное решение и тем хуже она вела себя. Я жалел ее, потому что ее родители играли роль полисменов, а не друзей.
In the house of another friend of mine parental authoritynon-existent. I've never come across it on any border. We went there, if they wanted to escape from parental supervision. Sometimes his mother peeped into his room, but it looked more like a courtesy visit rather than a parent control. Yes, it was »a safe place» if I had to do something on the sly. But the house seemed empty and very »fragile».
When I thought about this chapter, the key word to meI thought the word »balance». Remembering his adolescence, I am particularly grateful to my parents for what they have managed to maintain a balance in these years. Most teen needs to his parents to strike a balance. We need to balance the various extremes.
• The girl is confident that she »knows everything myself,» and then comes home from school, sobbing, because quarreled with her best friend.
• Guy feels »invincible» and his mood fluctuates between euphoria and despair.
• The teenager fiercely defends its independence, but every now and then asking for help.
• The body is fully ripe for sex, but the boy does not understand this side of life, does not know its dangers, does not understand how to dispose of it properly.
• It is an ignorant teenager rejects any authority.
• For the moment, he can turn from an adult, self-confident man in a confused kid.
• You yourself torn between the desire to control the child and the desire to see it yourself.
• You then get angry at him, for some reason, is filled with love.
• You continue to educate the child, but to prepare him for a life without parents.
