If you are going second time to cross the threshold of the registry office, every woman believes that much this time, certainly will succeed. No idea what all the hard stuff is just beginning. Especially if the second marriage she shall, with the child. Yes, the new stepfather is caring and affectionate, Yes he smiles, brings chocolate and gives a toy a foster child, that's just genuinely all that?
What to do to avoid mistakes and not to ruin for a second time just built a family? There are some recommendations that you can protect yourself from egoist, a pretender or just a narcissist.
The first thing to remember: never hide in the period of acquaintance with new Beau the existence of your child. Believe me, nothing good it will not. But distrust or even censure by the honest men you can get. He will think that you have hidden from him the important fact in order to lure into their network. And there already and he ain't going anywhere... go Anywhere and how. And love will, and the child will be ready to accept, but a lie will forgive hardly. Just think, if this thing hid in the little things will lie constantly.
Here one important point. Understand a woman's desire to look young and not burdened with problems in the form of children and previous husbands. But you aren't young. Ex-husband has disappeared from your life, and the child – is that a problem. Believe me, if you met a man standing, then your attitude to the child he will judge on the relationship with joint children. A loving mother who is proud of their child, will never look bad. And then if he likes you, and the child will try to find a way.
The second important rule: it is essential to introduce future husband and child. Spending the weekend together, to go to the zoo, on nature and going to the movies. In passing, we can go to toy stores, books or computer games. Word where every tear your child. And there ... look at your man. How often they hide their true feelings in the form of whims, requests! It is in this scenario, when you will be in a pleasant environment, and not, as the child, surely, something to ask, or even begin to beg coveted thing, you will be able to assess the reaction of the applicant for your hand.
If your macho will start to buy up all the stalls, do not believe, most likely he's pulling the wool over the eyes. If will silently watch as you deal with the whims and requests, without taking part, and the rest of your life, you'll solve problems alone. Should be a reasonable part, easy indulgence, in any case, not the notation. If he started reading to the kid or teenager a lecture on good behavior, grab the child and run away. You got on a bore, which will go into pots, cabinets, and cosmetics, and simultaneously to teach you to live permanently.
The third and also very important point, if all is well, go to the store were great fun, with a child, contact had been established, and remember about themselves. Meet his friends. Pay attention to whatever company that made it. If your request to help move furniture or fix a kids bike stumbles upon a story about how he needs to immediately go to Pyotr (Vaska, Mitike and afterwards), and this is not the first time, then draw your own conclusions. You will always be in second place.
By some strange law of nature and a woman second, and third husband chooses on the same principle. If it is weak and defenseless, then reaches for strong men, who often err by the fact that in a drunken stupor confused wife with a punching bag and work your skills on her. Parting with such a person, she truly believes in what next, will definitely be a true gentleman. But it takes a little time and it all starts again. Therefore, before with a head rush into a new marriage, need to understand what prevented you to live in the previous. And blame not only her husband, but also disadvantages, to understand and adopt.
Only then, knowing everything about himself, having the mind, discernment and mind, a real woman will go in search of happiness and find it, rest assured!
