4. Respect the adolescent desire for independence. Adolescents need the bond but not enslaved, and parentsWe should clearly distinguish between the two. All parents make in early childhood and in subsequent years, will strengthen the dependence or independence of a teenager; eventually ends up educational work of parents, but their relationship with the children. Often parents are afraid to give the teenager the freedom, for fear that he is not yet ripe for it. But the young man, eager to independence, but not ready for it, no wiser on what you'll be all the time piously reminded him about it.
When your teen needs more freedom,a little step aside and allow it to make their own decisions and take responsibility for them. Usually, if a teenager is not yet ready for the newfound freedom, he will come back to you and ask for further guidance.
5. Keep a sense of humor. Чтобы успешно управлять ребенком, нужно уметь с помощью доброго юмора находить правильный баланс между любовью и дисциплинарными взысканиями. Подросток или взрослый человек сделают в пределах разумного все, что угодно, если попросить их об этом деликатно и весело. Чувство юмора является противоядием против слишком серьезного отношения к подростковому возрасту. Родителям следует помнить, что даже если подросток относит их ко второму веку до нашей эры, через несколько лет он признает их жителями двадцатого или двадцать первого века. Смех в доме создает атмосферу доброжелательности и радости, а подростку нужно учиться получать удовольствие от семейной жизни и почаще смеяться и вместе с другими, и над самим собой.
6. Discuss possible changes. From time to time, discuss with your teenchanges occurring in his age, for example, house rules and changing the pressure that it can be tested in the future. During these years, it is too late to begin sex education, but it should continue into adolescence. Of course, you have already prepared the teenager to the many changes that will occur in his body, but now is the time to repeat everything said above and open channels of communication on sexuality.
7. Seek the understanding of other children. You can help younger brothers and sisters teenagerbetter understand its needs, if talk about it face to face with them. Discuss with the younger children are the issues on which they may have friction with the teenager so that they do not exacerbate your situation with their complaints. By installing them partnerships, parents can help them better understand adolescence, with the result that the younger will be much easier to live when they reached the same age.
8. Listens to a teenager. Many parents do not actually listen to histeenager - at least in their minds closed to him. Over the neglect of the thoughts and feelings of a teenager, which afford many parents, it is hard to imagine: »In the end, he was still only a child. We will listen to him when he will understand what he is talking about! ».
The questionnaire for adolescents was raised aquestion: »By creating your family, whether you want it to be similar to the one in which you live now, or would you like to change something? If so, what is it? ». The vast majority replied that they would be listened to more often their children. One teenager admitted: »When I speak to my mother with a personal problem, she is horrified by my words, and tells me to throw this nonsense out of your head! If I speak with the same problem to his father, then I listen to him lecture hour. »
Today's young people - is a new generation, and theyYou should feel that we really care about their problems and that we can listen to them without departing from itself, without condemning them and in no way to blame. Active listening in adolescence is becoming a more serious matter, because without it will not be able to bridge the gap between generations.
9. Provide security, love and acceptance. A teenager needs a safe relationship,which do not vary with the circumstances. He needs to know that in case of further misunderstanding and disagreement of his relationship with his parents will never be interrupted.
Зрелая любовь к подростку означает, что мать и отец готовы участвовать в жизни и возрастании своего ребенка, и постепенно выпускать эту растущую личность в окружающий мир, который постоянно расширяется вокруг нее по мере ее взросления. Родителям следует быть чрезвычайно ласковыми с маленьким ребенком, и подросток, которого в детстве утешали, когда он набивал себе шишки и синяки, подрастая, не будет стыдиться родительской ласки, не будет стремиться к преждевременному сексуальному контакту, чтобы компенсировать то, чего ему так недостает. У подростка не будет дополнительного стимула стремиться к эротическому удовольствию.
10. Is a sample of a happy marriage. Teenagers need to see their parentsdaily express their love for each other. According to the meticulous research, marital relations are the most critical period when children reach adolescence. One of the reasons lies in nervous exhaustion due to the confrontation with the teenagers. Other problems are not related to the child, but are generated by unmet needs in the relationship between husband and wife,
In the first years of life the child's mother mayindependently satisfy the demand for the safety of the child, but in a stormy adolescence the child is particularly in need of attention from his father. If a husband and wife were able to remove all obstacles that prevent them from fully enjoying conjugal relations, the many problems their teen would also have disappeared. teen safety largely strengthened when his family he saw the security source.
