For many centuries, people are looking for an answer tothe question »How to properly educate a child?» Many parents, psychologists, scientists are trying to create a universal list of rules to follow that can foster a strong, vibrant, spiritually rich person with high moral principles. The debate lasted to this day, because each child is unique, and methods of education, which is quite suitable for one child may be completely unacceptable for another. However, the charter to seek the answer to the question »What should I do?», Some psychologists have gone the other way and have developed a few rules »commandments», concerning the fact that in any case it is impossible to do when dealing with any child. Well, try to list these »commandments», I hope it will help parents avoid many mistakes in the upbringing of their children.
1. Итак, первое, ну и , пожалуй, самое очевидное — Ребенка ни при каких обстоятельствах НЕЛЬЗЯ УНИЖАТЬ…
Quite often, many of us, while»Education» can not resist the offensive statements in the address of the child, such as: »Do you even have a head on your shoulders?», »You can not do anything himself forever to make!» And so on and so forth! Now, remember, no matter what the circumstances were not, so do not ever say! The consequences of such accident spoken phrases you can be very serious. These expressions we destroy positive self-esteem of the child, somewhere deep opinion is formed in his mind: »I am poor, I can not, I have nothing ever happens.»
2. Никогда НЕ УГРОЖАЙТЕ РЕБЕНКУ…
Phrases such as: »If you do so again, I will take the belt, go to the corner,» and the like, in the child's upbringing is absolutely ineffective. Threats you accomplish nothing, except that the baby, believing in them, you will begin to be afraid of, and in the future, perhaps, and hate.
3. Do not force your child to give you a promise ...
Пожалуй, каждому из нас знакома фраза «Обещай, что ты больше никогда так не сделаешь!» От нее тоже лучше воздержаться. Лишь бы Вы его не ругали, малыш готов пообещать Вам все что угодно, а уже через несколько минут снова сделает то же самое. Для детей обещание лишь что-то наподобие игры, они еще не понимают, что на самом деле означает обещание. Ребенок живет настоящим и очень быстро забывает о данном обещании, ведь его нужно выполнять в будущем. Последствия такого метода воспитания, скорее всего, будут очень печальны: либо малыш будет испытывать чувство вины за невыполненное обещание, что, кстати, маловероятно, он вырастет циником и будет жить по принципу «мало ли чего я пообещал…».
4. DO NOT too much care of the child ...
Due to the constant care of parents, a child mayreceive an inferiority complex. Soon he begins to believe that without the help of mom (or dad), he can not do anything. Over time, we add to this, and the reluctance to do anything, the child will begin to require that for him all the others did, arguing it is very simple: »I can not»
5. DO NOT require IMMEDIATE OBEDIENCE ...
Who of us like it if someone startsto give orders and to demand their immediate execution? Imagine, for example, a situation to you suddenly fit your husband and say: »Immediately throw everything and pour me some tea!» Of course, you will not like it. So why do you do this with your child and need to immediately collect all the toys and go to dinner ?! Try to prevent the baby in advance, for example, »after a few minutes we will have dinner,» then later, if he starts acting up, you can in good conscience say that it warned about this in advance. Do not try to raise a child on the basis of unconditional submission, it can lead to the fact that without your »valuable suggestions» a child will not be able to do anything on its own initiative.
6. do not follow the child throughout the ...
Now let's talk about permissiveness. Children almost immediately feel if parents are afraid of them, something to deny. If they all allow, in the near future they will be convinced that it is worth only a little push and the parents will do what they would not have asked. That's the only way is not always the children grow up and outside the family, no one will rush to fulfill any of their caprice. In other words, if you indulge in all your child will grow out of it totally unsuitable for human life.
7. Choose clothes for a child his age.
Many girls want to look older than their years anddemand in the form of an order from their parents to buy clothes that they like, but it is not suitable for their age - a variety of mini-skirt, lace stockings, open tops, etc. In no case should not go on about their children: these dresses in most cases is funny and challenging (in all the worst sense of the word) look at the children.
It is best to buy things in a specialized children's store, which is present in the range of children's clothing wholesale (http://opt-baby.ru/).
8. Ну и, пожалуй, самое главное – НЕ ЛИШАЙТЕ РЕБЕНКА ДЕТСТВА…
All of us were once children, and therefore shouldunderstood that there is no ideal children. Childhood - a period of joyful discoveries, games and pranks. So do not deprive the child of his childhood! There is no need to command the children like soldiers on the parade ground. Externally perfect, »model» child is really very unhappy, he tries to be obedient, neat just because you need it, and because of that loses its individuality. Over time, these children often raises a lot of psychological problems. Therefore, you should never forget that in front of you is only children who need to play, run, mess around in the mud, and sometimes even naughty. Try to treat it with understanding!
