The life of the couple, not having children,It is a natural extension of the period of courtship. Typically, both spouses actively make a career. When problems arise, and the voltage increases, they avoid them, spreading every man to his side in this bustling, workaday world. Evenings, weekends and holidays they can spend as they please. However, children dramatically change the situation. Suddenly, the spouses have to take on the role of parents. Established family customs crumble. Starting a new life, to which the young couple was not used.
In marriage there are irreversiblechange. Persistent cries demanding child disrupts sleep mom and dad and relentlessly changing their lives. Perhaps for the first time before the couple realizes that they are becoming parents to assume full responsibility for the newborn, and will never be able to get rid of that responsibility.
At first, getting used to the fact that they She had a child whose parents are delighted andfeel justifiably proud. Baby - a visible sign for all others that the couple start a serious life together. Perhaps, since the wedding friends and family did not pay them too much attention, but now all come to their house to look at the newborn baby and to express their interest in a prosperous future new parents.
At the same time, the young father and motherimmersed in fear and frustration. Sleepless nights bring a husband and wife to the point of exhaustion. Being locked up in four walls, they feel very lonely under the burden of constantly perceived responsibility. They do not get pleasure from communicating with people outside the home and at work, their lives gradually overshadowed by depression. The scope of work on the house, which has to do for the sake of a tiny baby, the couple is feeling fatigue. House before immaculately clean, is now more like a pigsty. Increasing the liability of the parents, and, wherever they turned, everywhere they have to make some decisions: need to call the doctor, nurses, providing child day care, find kid friends for games, to buy baby food, care for the spiritual education of the child, discipline him,
In the first years of settling family parents do not
You can always decide which interval theyChildren should be born. Studies show that if you are born in the family of gay children with a difference of two years or less, they are likely to begin to compete with each other may have the whole battle will unfold between them, but be of good cheer. During the truce the children most likely will get great pleasure from communicating with each other. If children are born with an interval of four years, they have less in common and likely they will not be so hard to compete with each other.
There are also factors which are more important than the differencebetween the ages of their children. These include the age and health of the mother, the financial obligations, the reasons for which the couple want to have another child, the emotional climate in a marriage, a common desire to have another child, the emotional and the physical ability of both parents to invest time and effort in the education of another member family, available space in their house for another family member ... the list is endless moleno.
The couple begin to feel the pressure, when childrenIt becomes part of their lives. If parents do not have a single deprivation about how to educate and discipline children, conflicts between them are inevitable. They need to combine their ideals of family life. If the wife grew up in the countryside and she cherish the memories of how her whole family worked in the garden, and her husband, who grew up in the city, did not see the other wildlife, in addition to flowering tulips, then it is necessary to find a compromise
Sometimes parental responsibility so muchburdens married couple, she does not see any joy to fulfill parental responsibilities. Young fathers and mothers should always keep in mind both joy and hardship parent share. Children - this is one of the richest sources of pleasure derived from family life. And the happier the couple married, to a greater extent they are able to share the happiness with their children.
Most couples will be much easierto live in the first years after the wedding, if the period of engagement they will start the necessary preparations for the transition period. For example, if a married couple carefully read and study the book »The full courtship», »A full marriage» and »The art of being a parent,» she will have a more realistic idea of married life and the demands made upon it. Newlyweds can thoroughly acquainted with all the problems that arise in the process of raising children, and not be satisfied solely by emotional, idealistic definitions like: »Oh, yes! We certainly will be born three cute babies! ». The couple will work hard to resolve issues such as the distribution of roles, problem solving, decision making, compatibility, communication, finance and relationships with relatives. The easiest way to adapt to the new situation of couples receiving premarital counseling in the right amount, and two or three years after the creation of family pozhivshie for fun.
