Your fear of the child require too muchIt may lead to the fact that the child will be sweet, loving, gentle »mama's boy». Yes, he is kind and gentle, but he does not want and can not work, he can neither create nor to solve problems. What future awaits him when he left the house? Think about it and start learning it work right now.
Catching up in college, I was hired at the factory in the summerfor the manufacture of ice cream carts. I helped to lay the insulating gasket inside the trolley. One day when I went to work in our team, so I had to lay laying one. A few hours later I worked hard in the belief that with all the great cope, but when I finished with the first truck, approached the manager, looked inside and immediately pulled out of the cart all I worked so hard packed. I was told to start all over again. We discussed what I did wrong (almost all), and the second truck I coped much better. One only good intentions and efforts are not enough, we also need a skill to do their job well.
Creativity and problem solving
Работа, по сути, сводится к творчеству и умению решать проблемы. Либо вы разрабатываете бизнес-план, который позволит вам обойти конкурентов, либо ищете способ существенно сэкономить на затратах. Давая ребенку домашние поручения, вы открываете перед ним эти две стороны любой деятельности. Используйте школьные задания, домашние обязанности, а потом и подработки, чтобы научить ребенка творческому подходу к работе и умению решать проблемы.
Washing dishes is not limited to the rinsing dishesafter flakes. Let the child will break his head over such a problem: how to wash greasy pan, like using water, soap and brushes, having spent a lot of time and effort to do it again clean and shining.
Help your child make a schedule of homeAffairs, which he could stick. The main thing - that the child is not limited to your order »from here to here» without taking any responsibility.
evaluation
It is useful to put the child mark. He must get used to success and defeat. Evaluation will help him to return once again to the work done and make the necessary adjustments. It encourages responsible, punishes laziness. Each of us will receive from God's evaluation of how we have lived our lives. »For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what he has done while in the body, whether good or bad» (2 Corinthians 5:10).
No need to remove the children's experience of failure, this does not prepare a child to live in peace, where it is waiting for many failures. Teach him to accept failure and learn from them.
Competitiveness
Mastering the skills, the child often takescompetition and even conflict with other children. Perhaps the student for a nearby desk reads faster than he, or one of his brothers excel in the race. The competition is the desire to excel in skill, defeat opponents. »Know ye not that they which run in a race run all, but one receiveth the prize? So run that you may obtain » (Corinthians 9:24).
Competition - in itself a good thing, itIt helps the child to adapt to the reality of team work, the presence of competitors and motivated purpose. Help your child understand how to compete and to succeed. Yet in the first years of life competition can not take up too much space. It should increase gradually, as growing up and becoming more mature the child.
You can not cross a certain line incompetition. It is necessary to teach the child to submit to defeat and maintain good relations with the victorious rivals. On the basketball court major league players - serious opponents, and each defends his territory. But outside the court, many players 'opposing' teams - good friends. The relationship should be valued above the competition.
Fear of success and failure
It is very likely that your child will have to overcome the fear of success and fear of failure. These problems are closely related to his attitude to you, parents.
Разные причины вызывают страх перед успехом. Одни дети занижают свой потенциал, поскольку им кажется, что кто-то из родителей приревнует к их успеху и накажет их; другие боятся насмешек сверстников; третьи считают, что в случае успеха к ним предъявят еще более высокие требования, а потому предпочитают скрывать свои возможности; четвертые сопротивляются родителям, слишком активно подталкивающим их или вложившим всю свою жизнь в их достижения. Если ваш ребенок страдает от какой-либо из этих проблем, вы должны поговорить с ним, помочь ему признаться в своем страхе, заверить его в своей любви и готовности поддержать.
Anxiety over the possible failure - a good thing, if it does not pass a reasonable measure. It can motivate a person to help him focus on his task and execute it well to the end.
The problem is this anxiety,which reduces the activity of and prevent success. Sometimes the child is so afraid of the control that is simply not able to finish it, or paying for your own headache. In other cases, the child shows poor results in the sport.
Increased fear of failure can causevarious reasons. Sometimes it turns out that the child is afraid, as if he did not lose your love or not to incur your wrath. Sometimes he sees himself as »very bad», it is unworthy of love. If this is the case, try to heal the child from fear and relieve his anxiety. Talk to them, find out what scares him. Reassure him that your love is due no, you will not be angry with him, that you make mistakes, too. Give your child the time and opportunity to improve.
