The best method of weakening competition betweensiblings - it's to get them to look into each other's eyes. Not a day passed that Peter and Leland did not arrange fights and brawls, and no mother's words did not produce lasting impression on them. She threatened them, locked them in separate rooms, shouting at them. Although my mother brought herself to complete nervous exhaustion, the boys continued to rage, and were willing to continue to pester each other.
Once, when my mother was in the kitchen, her headsuddenly came to a reasonable idea. The inner voice suggested: »Make them a long time to look into each other's eyes.» Entering the dining room, my mother demanded, »Peter, you sit here, Leland, come here. Just sit in chairs facing each other and look at each other. I do not allow you to move or talk. Sit in silence and look at each other. When you start, I set the timer for five minutes (for two or three years old half this time is quite enough). So we began. »
Peter was nine years old, and he started to argue. Leland, who had not yet turned four, he tried to get down from his chair, but his mother held him by force. Then he tried to push the chair back, but in the end the two boys sat on chairs, having ceased to fidget, kicking each other's feet and oykat loudly. Mother put an end to their fight, and not paying attention to their protests, zanoyu set a timer for five minutes.
After the five minutes, except thathopeless confrontation could not be called the mother of the boys released. Still uncertain is that this method will bring some fruit, she was determined to continue to apply it with great love and dedication.
Since that day in the house began to sound familiar phrase: »So, guys, quick on the chairs.» Mom learned not to wait until then, until the squabbling sons grow into self-mutilation, but ordered Peter and Leland sit on chairs at the first sign of a quarrel. Children, of course, protested and sometimes even fought for the right to sit on the chair or another. Mother never yield to the pleas of the type: »He first started it» or »I did not do anything.» When the »innocent victim» was trying to convince her of his innocence, his mother would ask: »What was your role in this squabble?» Or »What could you do to prevent a quarrel?». And these questions have always been answered.
Several times my mother was ready to give up, becauseHe doubted the positive results of an unusual method. Over time, however, she noticed that not so many seats on the chairs and the boys that the situation at home becomes more peaceful and calm. She taught the sons of that to start a fight requires the presence of two people, since one can not fight a bully himself. Gradually, the boys began to develop a sense of personal responsibility for their actions, and this has helped them to build normal relationships outside the home.
One day my mother left the children alone at home, and shebriefly excused myself to the grocery store. When she returned, she found that Peter and Leland are sitting in their chairs, and the timer have two minutes left. Mom did not say anything. When the bell rang, the brothers stood up and went to play. Mom never asked what caused them to discipline themselves. Sons do the right thing, and it was the most important thing. Sequencing mother became a guarantee of success.
Однако данный метод может дать сбой в том случае, если родитель не выполняет свой план последовательно. Дети не усвоят урок, если их усаживать на стулья один раз в неделю, когда терпение иссякает. Соперничество может утихнуть только на это время, но не навсегда, как происходит при последовательном применении данного метода. Родителям, имеющим детей от двух с половиной лет и старше, лучше сократить время сидения на стульях вдвое, если они хотят добиться хороших результатов. А вы уже пробовали этот метод?
