In preschool and early school years aheadThey face a variety of skills, ethics and attitudes. In all these areas, you must either set certain limits or to give the child a chance to verify their existence. Give him the opportunity to fill their cones, do not rush to save him. Let's angry - anger will change the acceptance of reality.
If something does not add up in a relationship ifyour child is wrong, insist that he first apologized that he had to make amends for his misdeed. Teach him to ask for forgiveness. If he - the injured party is not easy for him, this process does not assent to it, when he starts to complain about the brother, sister or friend. Tell him that he went and told everyone in the face of her abuser, discussed with him what had happened and tried to forgive. The ability to forgive many times useful to him in life. And they themselves proceed with the child because the same principles. It is important that the child saw the benefit in working through conflict.
The functioning of the area provide a childthe possibility of failure. Do it notes, but do not let too much protest and throw the blame on others. Kindly support him for the failure, but certainly Make the child to recognize real shortcomings of their behavior and try to correct them. Do not let him give up, if there is no reasonable cause; vital tenacity produced in overcoming difficulties and failures. Ask the child to always tried to finish the job.
In the field of morality, you have to define for the childsystem of values, and at the same time provide it with sufficient reliability, so that he could talk to you about those aspects of his personality, which do not correspond to the ideal. If you do not allow the child to adequately express his »bad side», the bad quality of his personality will be suppressed by fear or break spontaneously. Reliability will allow the child to discuss and hatred, and anger, and selfishness. Teach him work through these feelings. You can not punish the child for his emotions, but one can not turn a blind eye to them. It must be said: »All of us sometimes feel like and are willing to forgive you for what you feel. Here you think you hate your sister. And what are you going to do? ».
Recognition of their sins and newfound understandinggive the child a sense of security. He can openly discuss their feelings, find people willing to help him constructively process these feelings. If the child can, without risk, to discuss those emotions, which - as he knows - not good, he will not experience the fear of these emotions, he will learn to cope with the destructive impulses, and it will not happen splitting into »bad» and »good», »I», he will not try to behave outwardly as best as possible, and save all the hate in my heart.
In many Christian families formeddifficult situation is because children do not dare to show parents their imperfections. They think that they must always be »good», that everything bad in them is absolutely unacceptable. There is a splitting of the poor »I» and a good »I» turns good outside, but poor stuck in the dark depths of the soul. In this case, the children are doomed either openly rebel against their parents, or pick up a destructive friends and partners that meet this dark side of the soul. Give your child a safe haven, let him open you their bad feelings and to achieve integration, while he was still a member of a close relationship with you; let the child does not conceal his feelings, not to split his soul.
