Precautions on the road
At the same time
active listening is not a method, helping to push the child to your
point of view as the correct answer. If you think you've mastered the new method of manipulating your child's way of thinking, then you
I do not understand the value of active listening. Although one of the main tasks of the parents - child instill certain values and its
It can not be solved directly by using active listening. Now is not the time, and this is not the best method.
Родителям также не следует поощрять ребенка открыто выражать свои чувства, чтобы потом предлагать ему готовые решения или пытаться исправить его. Дети понимают, что данный метод используется родителями с целью вытянуть из них информацию, и считают это унижением.
Let the facts do not confuse you and not confusing, — on
feelings respond feelings. Try to understand that your child feels, daring to openly tell you about happened. Put yourself in
his place. One father was disappointed after his first attempt to actively listen to the daughter. He said that his daughter forbade him to repeat all her the words. At first, you find it difficult to determine what actually feels a child, and you can go the path of least resistance: just repeat everything said child.
capture
those moments when your baby is not set up to discuss with you the problems. It is not detectable
after he gave you to understand, that ended the discussion. respect his
the right to privacy and not to resort to active listening, when a child asks you for specific information, such as: »How much milk I need to buy?» or, »When you come back home»
During the application of the method of active listening withyou may experience the following: when you really begin to recognize another person's feelings, your personal attitudes or opinions change. When you focus, trying to understand other people's feelings, you get an opportunity to reassess their own experiences. It can be scary, because people used to take a defensive position, do not allow yourself to listen to the ideas and opinions that differ from his own. However, flexible person is not afraid of change.
God created us with two ears, but with one language, and when parents manage to curb the language and to open both ears, they witness the amazing changes in the after-dinner conversations.
Listen to your child, a littleman, expressed surprise, curiosity and eagerness. Listen to his voice with their ears, eyes and heart. Sometimes the child will happily chirp, something telling you, sometimes he will talk to you about their despair and distress, and to ask you to be hesitant; Sometimes his voice would sound enthusiastic, and he will tell you about the wisdom and knowledge that suddenly opened his young mind. Give your child the greatest gift: himself. Make your home a place of exchange of ideas and thoughts that no one is afraid to be humiliated and mocked. Your children will talk about all kinds of problems that they had never discussed with you and your home becomes a place of their growth and development.
Active listening - is not only effectivea tool to inform about the favorable attitude and developing a warm relationship, but also an exceptional method of teaching a child the art of right choice and taking responsibility for their behavior. Because during active listening, you are not trying to influence the choice of your child, he will know that you believe in his ability to make wise decisions. Having mastered the skills of active listening, you will help your child be more creative approach to solving problems arising from it. Phrases such as, »Oh, maybe it happened because ...» or »How do you think was the cause of this incident?» Or »How do you think, where it all began,» will help your child think about the arisen situation. Sometimes it helps to inversion of roles. You play the role of the child, and your child becomes a parent
And it should be stressed again that you must master the art of active listening before that, both try to use these tips. If you will try our latest recommendations before you have at home to establish an atmosphere of goodwill and trust, your insightful teenager considers it another form of manipulation. Further, at this stage solve your motive should not be an attempt to influence, guide or encourage your child to take your decision. Your goal in this case - just to help your child learn how to cope with their feelings and develop the ability to think clearly and solve problems.
